Evolve’s Sex-Toy Commercial Isn’t Very Evolved About Sex

The gun-safety  organization Evolve released a commercial recently that’s gone viral. You’ll see why if you watch it below.

Pretty funny, I have to admit. And I love it that commercials like this exist, cause duh lock up your guns, people. I’m glad Evolve is a thing. Awesome.

Also, I’d like to point out that the pink toy in there appears, from the glimpses I’m catching, to be a double-ended dildo. Yeeeeah, Mom! Get down witchobadself. And whomever else you’re using that monster with.

But… But. I have this sort of… grr… frustration about the ad, too. I mean, I get it. I totally get that this commercial is making a point in a funny, memorable, cheeky way. And there’s nothing wrong with it, really. It’s just… I mean…

Am I being completely over-feminist or too-aggressively sex-positive in thinking that it’s basically putting guns and dildos on sort of the same level of “bad things kids shouldn’t touch”? And that that idea is a bad one? I realize that they’re not saying kids will kill each other or themselves with dildos. I get that they’re just saying this is a funny situation–now imagine if it weren’t funny but instead tragic. And I get why that’s important. But can we please start putting away the idea that sex toys, and sex in general, is on some kind of level playing field with gun violence when it comes to the taxonomy of “bad stuff” in our society?

Dildos give pleasure to bodies. Pleasure is good. Dildos and vibrators cause orgasms, which are good for mental and physical health by promoting blood flow, brain activity, and relaxation. Sex toys are good for the world.

Guns kill things. That is the only thing that they are made for. Killing things is, on the whole, bad.

Sure, it’s fine to be a little embarrassed if your kid finds your jelly dong, especially if that kid then proceeds to play with it in front of some other mom in the yard. But having a sex toy in your house just means you’re a normal, healthy human being with a sex drive who’s probably less stressed out than you would be if you didn’t have one. Having guns in your house means you are prepared to kill things. They are not the same. And I get that the ad isn’t saying they are, but still. I’m just sick of watching gun violence, blood, guts, and more splattered all over movies, TV, music, video games, and more… while depictions of female sexual pleasure get NC 17 ratings, no news coverage, and zero help from lawmakers or medicine.

Sex and violence are not the same. Dildos and guns are not on an equal “bad” footing. You should talk to your kids about both: sex and violence. But one should be good and one should be bad, for reasons any sane person can understand. Can we try to make that distinction, maybe a lil’ bit? C’mon, Evolve. Evolve your views about sex.




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