Guess What, Monday? It’s Gonna Be Tuesday Soon.

Okay, Monday. You wanna do this thing? Let’s do this thing. Do not think for one second that just because you are the first day of a five-day week, during which I will spend my entire paycheck on rent and pay several bills out of my previous paycheck and not be able to afford to do anything out of the house except laundry and grocery shopping, and during which apparently everyone at the office will decide to be a big turd to me, that I will take your tyranny lying down. Hell no. I’m gonna flip you over on your back and get on TOP, Monday. I am going to ride you into the ground until it’s Tuesday. You only get to fuck with me once a week, Monday. That’s 1 out of every 7 days. You know what I’m doing the rest of the week, Monday? I’m getting all up on the other days of the week. We’re all giggling and pinching and tickling and getting food delivered and doing our nails and making out and stuff.

But until it’s Tuesday, Monday, I’m gonna maintain the best mood I can. I’m gonna go the Asian grocery and submit my film to the Feminist Porn Awards and work on a review of a new Courtney Trouble movie and stuff. And I’m gonna have fun doing it, whether you like it or not.

I’m also going to link to this very interesting article on the changing relationship between fans and porn stars at the AEE convention in Vegas this year. People are going to read it and think some great thoughts. And maybe write some comments.

And I’m gonna post this old-ass video of The Velvet Underground playing “Venus in Furs” and imagine how surreal it must have been to be in San Francisco when they came to town in the mid-60’s at the height of the peace and love stage of music there. Can you imagine being all hopped up on love and flowers and acid and thinking everyone was doing the same thing, and suddenly seeing and hearing this? You’d be all confused and freaked out and be like, “Oh, Andy Warhol, you are such a weirdo. Who the hell are these guys?” …And then you’d spend the rest of your life telling everyone how you saw them live before it was cool. At least, that’s what I would have done.

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