5 Reasons Not to Vote for Mitt Romney

Sure, I’ve got my issues with Obama. I wish he’d done some things differently. I don’t approve of the drone wars, for instance. And I wish more progress had been made on environmental issues. But, for the love of all that you consider holy, whether it be pornography, women’s health (shit, everyone’s health), foreign policy, gay rights, human rights in general… DO NOT VOTE FOR MITT ROMNEY AND PAUL RYAM. Sweet, sweet mother of us all, do not vote for these soulless patches of mannish flesh. You want reasons? Ok. Here you go.

1) They don’t respect women’s autonomy over their reproductive health. Period. At all. They literally, actually want to force your mom/sister/wife/girlfriend/friend/teacher/doctor/other female in your life to bear children conceived via rape or incest. They don’t want to help poor women get access to contraceptives that would help them avoid those pregnancies in the first place. They actively promote an agenda that seeks to rob women of their right to make their own decisions about their reproductive choices, their health, and their futures. You can extrapolate from this what you will, but what it says to me is that they don’t consider women capable of making these decisions for themselves. They think women can’t be trusted with their reproductive powers. They fear and loathe the female. They have no respect for the autonomy of over half the population. 47% of America? Try 51% of the world. Why are they so suspicious/scared of us? I can’t begin to know. But I sure as shit don’t trust men who don’t trust me, much less those who see me as a problem to be controlled or less than a full human being because I have a uterus. It’s my uterus, motherfuckers. Back off.

2) They oppose gay marriage. So add the list of people they outright don’t respect or want to grant autonomy the entire LGBTQ community. We don’t get to get full rights if we want to marry someone we love who identifies as the same gender as us. Shit, I wonder what they’d think if we wanted to marry someone who didn’t identify as either gender? I’m imagining red faces and steam coming out of their ears. These guys can’t handle reality. Reality is that people fall in love and want to get married sometimes, and have sex with each other, and love each other fully. That’s not ok with Ryan and Romney.

3) This picture. Have you ever seen something this nefarious and just plain creepy? Ever? Captions welcome.

4) They want to “crack down” on pornography. Seriously. There’s an anti-porn plank in their party platform. Literally. These guys have so few better things to do that they’ve vowed to go after pornographers for what they consider “obscenity.” Considering they don’t want women to marry women because “God doesn’t like it,” I’d hate to see their reactions to most perfectly normal, often beautiful lesbian porn, much less queer porn scenes of hot sex between trans and cis men. I’m imaging red faces, steam coming out of the ears, and pillows planted firmly in laps while they pretend they don’t want to stand up because their “knees hurt.” Posers. I mean, seriously: Syria is slaughtering its own people, Iran is working on a nuclear program, North Koreans are starving, the oceans are rising (but they don’t believe that), fossil fuels are running out, Congress is totally corrupt, and these guys are worried about whether you get to watch somebody drink soda out of somebody else’s butt? Something is wrong here.

5) Dude. Just. Do you need a fifth reason? Ok: Climate change denial. Outright contempt for the poor. Bank deregulation. Anti-cap-and-trade. Total lack of foreign policy credentials. Binders full of women. STRAPPED HIS DOG TO THE ROOF OF HIS CAR… I could keep going. All I know is… Mitt Romney does not equal a good person. Mitt Romney + Paul Ryan still does not equal one good person. I don’t know firsthand how good a person Barack Obama is, but I can tell you he’s got both these guys beat with one hand tied behind his back.

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