Not to Toot My Own Horn, But…

Motherfuckin’ toot, y’all. I am not at liberty to say what’s afoot, but it could be massive. As such, I’m devoting my energies to trying to finish this article for xoJane and blogging about unrelated stuff instead of obsessing over my possible-maybe-really-huge-news.

So, y’all remember the Patraeus sex “scandal” that was sooooo fascinating until we all realized how terribly boring it was? That wasn’t a scandal, yous guys. This is a scandal. Some editor of the Oxford English Dictionary–ie, the dictionary that keeps everything forever and ever so we’ll never entirely forget about obsolete words–went around deleting words in the 70s! The damn 70s! Everyone was smoking the dope and sniffing the yayo and swapping wives and forgetting about language! “Burchfield deleted 17% of foreign “loanwords” (including Americanisms) that had been included 1933 by editor Charles Onions.” Ok, first of all, there was an editor with the last name Onions? God, I love the British. And secondly… I don’t know how many words that is, but… shit, son. Not cool.

And in real news that affects things: women in the gaming world have had it with the misogyny and have been vocalizing their distaste for being treated like sub-human pieces of boob meat for a while now. This has drawn quite the backlash from male gamers, who seem to think that gaming is a sanctified bastion of boys-clubiness that shouldn’t be bashed for its bigoted ways, because… that makes them have to behave like adults… and they don’t like that…? Not sure exactly what the defense for revolting behavior is, actually. But the Twitter phenom of the hashtag #1reasonwhy, as in one more reason why there aren’t more women in game development or play. This article lists some of the most upsetting. My most throw-up-in-my-mouth-y? “ Once heard an Art manager say ‘We don’t need any more women, they’re more trouble than they’re worth’ as he viewed applications.” Ick, ick, ick.

And speaking of Twitter: this? This just makes me sick. Chris Brown has got to be the most worthless pile of vomit on the A list, and that’s really some stiff competition. What will it take for people who don’t appreciate women being dehumanized, degraded, and abused just for being female to rain on this douchebag’s parade? How does he continue to be famous? To be not just famous but popular? To win awards for his work? I realize that in many cases a separation between the artist and the person, or the politician and the person, or what have you, might be worth observing. But when every other thing out of your mouth or your cell phone seems to be a statement about the shittiness potential of the human being, whether it’s in a professional setting or not… Maybe you should be told, not gently at all, that you’re an appalling affront to humanity and you should sit the fuck down and shut the fuck up and wear a dunce hat for, oh, the rest of your life. Jackass.

Well. Let’s all have a bit of a laugh, shall we? Check this out: you can have sex with demons. And it’s apparently fantastic. But watch out! It’ll turn you into a homosexual.

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