Womp-Womp (that’s the sad trombone sound)

At least I THINK that’s the sad trombone sound, which I think is the word for the sound I’m  making in my head. You know, the sound that happens when someone in a cartoon or cheesy sitcom says or does something really dumb or gets disappointed in some hilarious way? The thing about the internet, I’m suddenly realizing, is that you can say *sad trombone* in facebook comments all you want, and you can even write “womp-womp” on occasion in e-mails, and you can make the sound you’re thinking of in real-time conversation with people… But there’s no way to be sure than when I write “sad trombone” or “womp-womp” or even explain myself that the people reading this will think of the same sound I’m thinking of. Maybe it’s totally different in your heads. Maybe you’re hearing the sound Goofy makes when he falls off a cliff. That’d look more like “Waaaahahahahooeeeeeyyyy” if I writing it, btw.

ANYWAY. The point is, I have sad news for anyone who’s going to be in Vegas over AVN week. I’d been hoping to collaborate with Kelly Shibari, Lainie Speiser, and several others on an event at the Hard Rock on Wednesday, January 16, but it appears that’s not going to be happening after all. I believe it’s a case of too many cooks offering to be in the kitchen, but then most of them leaving their chef hats somewhere and wandering off to find them and never making it TO the kitchen.

I’m bummed, of course, because I wanted to show my awesome videos from Consent off to the hordes of heathens in Vegas, but the truth of the matter is… I kind of hate Vegas. I’m sure if I ever went there for pleasure instead of for work purposes, or if I ever went and had literally ANY money to spend, I might enjoy it. But I’ve always been there for AVN, trying to chase people down, get interviews on an insanely packed show floor, try to remember who’s who while hungover… It’s madness and I don’t enjoy it.

So for the first time in five years I’m not going to Vegas for AVN. AT ALL. Instead I’m gonna stay home and work on a book proposal and two graphic novels and not spend all my money. I might miss the free drinks at the penny slots, but that’s about it.

And if you want to see my videos shown elsewhere, never fear! I’ve entered one of them into a film festival (no word yet) and will be submitting another into a conference/awards weekend, and I’m considering the best line of approach toward the Museum of Sex here in NYC. Nobody needs to go to Vegas AT ALL for any of this. High fives!

Oh and DOUBLE high fives! I found audio and video to back up my womp-womp!

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